Week 3: Learning stuff already!

August 21st marked my 3rd week of locking up! It has been an interesting process. As I sat back yesterday evening to reflect my newest transition in life, I am in awe with what dreadlock has come to symbolize for me at this point.

Lessons I have learned so far:

Patience:

In the world we live in these days, one gets too used to having things done right away. Technology brings us communication within a blink of an eye, dinner can be ready in as little as 3 minutes, and traveling long distances can be done in a matter of hours (if not less). So here I am, trying to develop dreadlocks that will last my a long time and even though they are starting to bud, the journey is still a while to come. I have learned to treasure each day more and pay attention to little changes here and there. Beautiful things come about with time. My baby dreads has taught me to slow down a little, make note of how things transition themselves and absorb each day with a renewed love for life.

Expectations:

A valuable lesson I encountered a week ago is the concept of expectations. Expecting things to be a certain way only to be disappointed.  Just when I thought all my dreads where locking up equally, several of them came apart and caused me to suffer a bit. This is very true in almost every aspect of our lives. We tend to set expectations of how things will and should be. But when the time comes, as we see it, what we see or experience often times has us feeling gipped. Especially when we put forth a lot of effort and mental work to develop a moment, such as planning a party or even something as trivial as making a desert, it doesn't come out as to how we envision it to be. Perhaps with the media the way it is, we get sucked into the illusion of how things "ought to be".  Now, I am just letting my dreads lock up how they will. They may not be picture perfect, but they are mine and each dreads are to be cherished.

Attachment:

Like anything that has a personal ripple of effect in our lives, we tend to be attached to things emotionally on any level. We get attached to a pet, a car, a lover or even a particular sports team. I found myself becoming overly careful with my hair dreading that I hesitate to touch it too much with fear that I will cause it to unravel. Ridiculous isn't it? I mean, it's only hair, who cares. There are countless beings in the world suffering and I am focused on my hair?!?!? At least I came to that awakening so early on. I am practicing more about "letting go" in the sense that all things come and go and I have no control over it. Hell, I may become bald within the next 10 years, so I have to accept that. With that said, I also have to realize that life just flows. Simply put. It's a profound awakening I think and I look forward to practicing that concept.


Growth and stages:

Another thing I have come to ponder is the journey of growth and stages of my dreadlock ordeal. I come to appreciate what dreadlocks symbolizes throughout the world, specifically to Hindu yogis and Rastifarians. Most would say that dreadlocks, being a symbol of nature and separation of vanity, are reserved for those that have an inner desire to experience what it means to be pure. I don't mean it in a sense that a person shouldn't be drinking coffee or eating Dunkin-Donuts because of the unnatural state of it (and I am still attached to those things HA!) but more to imply a state of mental clarity. Truth. So what has my dreadlock journey done to instill such a concept? There are three stages of locking and I am at the very beginning; the baby stage. Like a baby, I am learning to deal with the locking process and all that it entails both physically and mentally. Unless you've ever gone natural to grow dreads, I fear this may be lost on your part. It truly is a lot of work to separate the dreads from congo-ing (two or more locks growing together to make one huge dread), making sure the ends of each dreads are not drying out,  and lastly, avoiding anything that would condition the hair and scalp which is an enemy to the locking process. I look forward to the teen stage and anyone that knows teens, can get a good idea of the process that is like with hair. Just a rebellious mess of knots, loose hairs and stubborn interlocking.

It has been so far a great journey for me. While I know the general masses would find this to be such a ridiculous waste of time to either grow dreadlocks or simply to parallel the lessons one can learn, it is MY journey and one that has spiritual meaning for me. If it makes me a better person, then I'll have all that much more power to me!

Good Days and Bad Days

Today marks exactly 2 weeks since I started the dreading process. It has been fun so far but I DO have my mix of good days and bad. Today is a bad one. My head looks like a wrestling match between straight long hair against knotted hair. It's a cross between cave-man and burned-out rock star. UUUGGGHH. Anyone who has been through this will tell ya, "relax man, its all part of the process. Takes time dude".

The hardest part is trying to separate the dreads to prevent "crossovers" of hair and developing a congo entwinement.  Dreadlocks, as they mature will be much less hassle and maintenance free for the most part, but I still have about 9 months (with luck) to go. On a positive note, my dreads have tamed down quite a bit and I don't have as much of an afro of dreads so much as I did a week ago. I wear a tam most of the time when I'm out and about and take it off when I am at home. I can only hope my new place of employment will allow me to wear it as I teach during the day. If not, I am sure they will change their mind upon seeing the WWF match going on, on my head. Let's hope that the dreads win over the loose straight hair!

Here's to a dreadful, natural beginning!

 (pictures will be posted soon and all smart-ass remarks are expected).

Needed a new wallet, so made my own!

I made my own personalized wallet. Only one like it in the whole world. Nothing like boosting your own ego!

Day 6...Banana-rana-mama-Jama

Think this will be my last "EVER DAY" picture as not much is going on with the babies. Still lots of frizzies and I am hoping a friend will stop by tomorrow to help re-backcomb some of them. Dreads are seriously a combination of a hate/love relationship with constant attention at this point. Can't wait to move on to the "teen" stage.....but then again, the "teen" stage can be a whole new pain! I should know. I teach high school! LOLOLOL

Day 5....BLAH

My babies have tamed down just a tiny bit, but, fuzzy as hell. 3 more months of this? Oh, my new workplace is gonna LOVE this!

The First Wash

Some people recommend not to wash new baby dreads for 2 weeks. WHAT?!?!? I was lucky to go as long as I did (5 days). I figured I'd just follow my heart and go for it. I washed my "rat-nest" hair this morning and it was a new experience. After having long straight hair for 10+ years, I have never felt my head become so heavy while the dreads soaked up water. It was just like a sponge! With that said, for the first time in 11 years (probably more) I used a hair dryer. It felt like it took forever and my arms just about pryed off after holding it up for so long to do the deed.

Right now I feel a little disappointed as I see that many dreads have come undone and are coming apart at the roots. This sucks! I knew it would do that, but some part of me was hoping that I was going to be the exception to the rule. I know it's gonna take a long time for the dreads to finally knot up and while I am constantly telling myself to just go with the flow, I can't help but wonder if I am going about it all wrong. I can't wait to read this post months later and laugh! For now...... palm-roll, twist, palm-roll, backcomb, palm-roll......

Trying to deal with it! CRAP that HURTS! While Kelly is day dreaming, Jen is trying to figure out what the hell was in my hair...EEEEWWWWWW

Taking care of business.....Shoulda left the top of my hair like that. That is HOT! DUNG HAIR!

Team Knotty: The best Pit-Crew a person can have. We look like a Mormon family from a parallel universe!

Lisa and her fascination with man hair!

First row done.....OUCH!

The deed

Week 1: the Dreadful Dreads of Beauty

I titled this “dreadful” because the method to which I had my dreads created was the most painful I have ever sat through....for almost 6 hours straight!!!! I opted for the backcombing method with some twist and rips here and there. I have 9 tattoos and all of those combined didn’t hurt as much as backcombing! BUT, that was what I wanted. I was blessed by three incredible people in my life; Kelly, a fellow dready, college bound student  who is learning ASL, Lisa, a friend whom I will always cherish, from my former place of employment and my best friend in the world, Jennifer. Each of them help give birth to a dream I have secretly yearned for, well, for most of my life.  Now for the the nitty gritty details... 

Using a “lice” comb (stronger than a regular comb) each sectioned hair (about the diameter of a quarter) was backcombed, starting at the base of my neck area. Trust me, it HURTS! 

Kelly, a dready since a year and a half kick started it all. I trusted her because she went through the same damn thing. My hair is crazy thick so the backcombed dreads looked ridiculously fat and sponge-like. Mind you, they will eventually lock up a little more and calm down a bit ( I looked like Sideshow Bob when it was finished). I lost about 20% of my hair length but that didn’t bother me much. As much as I treasured having long hair, it is surprisingly refreshing to be able to sit back in a chair and not worry about tossing my ponytail to the side or have it wedged into a crack of a set and ripping hair out. It is shoulder length now and that is fine with me. 

Lisa came over about an hour after we started and I secretly think she enjoyed seeing me whence in pain each time she tugged a lock of hair. Not to worry, I shall get my revenge! But then again, maybe I deserved it?

In The Beginning...

On July 31st, 2010 I gave birth  to 30 baby dreads from my (what used to be) waist length hair (now it’s to my shoulders...more on that later). The point of this blog is to give an ongoing account of my “dready” adventures (weekly), seek out other deaf people in the world with dreads and whatever else finds its way on these pages. All are welcome and questions/advice encouraged (but please be nice). 

Dread beginnings...

So why dreads? Why now? I’m pushing 40 and I want to have dreadlocks???? Midlife crisis? Identity problems?

I actually have a very profound reason for wanting to lock my hair and have shared this with very few people. Mainly because I find that, unless you have an open mind and a kind spirit, this whole “dreadlock” thing might be otherwise ridiculous to some. However, anyone that knows me would simply say “That’s Jae, he follows his own path”! I am taking the time to simply share my path with you all in kind of an “open-book” per se. While the main intent is to share my journey of growing dreads, its also a kind of therapeutic opportunity for me to express my thoughts and faults. More on that later...once I figure out this whole blog thing. Bare with me. 

Be happy. Be free. Live life as much as you can. Its too damn short!